Remember Me?

From Brown Eyes is back!

Hi! That’s me. Tess. Allow me to reintroduce myself. Because it has been a hot minute since I last posted.

I started From Brown Eyes way back in 2015. At the time, I had just left my job in corporate America and was ready to push pause on my life.

Like there was some kind of remote control.

Picture it: The Remote Control of Life. Just pick up The Remote and change the channel. With one click of a button everything will be different. It’s that easy!

It was through the sheer naivety of being 23 that I thought I could just pick up The Remote and press pause. That, and having the privilege of being able to quit my job, move back in with my parents rent free, and do whatever I wanted because I was in control of my Remote.

*click* *pauses life*

But, of course, life holds for no one.

What I thought was going to be a quick press of a button was actually a free fall into the unknown. It was realizing that my life at that point was a runaway train, going faster than I could control on a path that I hadn’t realized I was setting. Or maybe I did realize I was setting it. But I was so focused on laying the tracks that I never stopped to ask myself why am I doing this? All I could hear was the word achieve that echoed back to me each time my hammer secured another piece of the track in place.

Achieve. Achieve. Achieve.

At 23, I jumped from that train. And my journey into the unknown began. I traveled. I read. I learned. I listened. I wrote.

I wrote so much then. With fervor and with an appetite that was never satiated. I was hungry for the words. Hungry to express myself. Hungry to be seen completely. Hungry to understand who I am.

But I lost that hunger. At first because I was full. Later because…well, maybe that is a story for another time.

As I write this, I realize I am sweating. Because I am once again confronted with the brutal and invigorating vulnerability that comes with laying yourself bare on paper. You, my dear reader, might be someone I’ve known only professionally up until this point. You might be someone I’ve never met. You might be someone who birthed me (hi, mom!). You might be someone who knows my deepest and darkest already. Either way, I’m going to continue on my journey.

Because I am finally hungry again.

-TM

P.S. I’m not sure how frequently I’ll be posting, so if you want to stay in the know, subscribe and you’ll be emailed when I do.

6 thoughts on “Remember Me?

  1. Anonymous

    I’ve been missing seeing your writings, and being able to read them. I have been wondering where you’ve been hiding. I usually don’t say anything. I do enjoy reading everything you have to say, and love that you’re back to keep in touch. Staying safe, I hope!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hello! It is good to be back. I’ve been hiding in Sweden, adjusting to life here. I’ll definitely be writing about this more. Thank you for the warm welcome back and thanks for reading and commenting!

    Like

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