So here is something that we all know: life will throw you a curve ball. You won’t know when, and you won’t know how, but you know it’s coming.

This big change in my life (quitting my job and moving back home) all happened because I was thrown a curve ball. Hold your horses –specific details to come in my next post. But for now, let’s just focus on the general information.

After being together for 3 years, my boyfriend asked me to move out. He did it on a Wednesday. I didn’t see it coming and I didn’t want it to happen. I was confused, angry, and hurt. But I am also resilient and rational. I was faced with a decision to make: Where am I going to live?

My first thought went to my parent’s house back in LA. I would be able to see my parents and save money (No rent! Thanks M+D for that!). But, ahhhh, moving home after 5 years of independence?! That is so not a Tess thing to do.

My second thought was to live on my own. I have lived on my own before, and loved it, but it was quite expensive. But still, an option…Decisions, decisions…

Well, you know what I chose! On a Monday, just 5 days after I was asked to move out, I gave Target my two weeks notice.

Was this a quick decision? Yes. What it a rash decision? Not at all.

I understood the costs and benefits of every option in front of me. But my decision was guided by one thing: my happiness. I stayed in Northern California post UCDavis graduation for my relationship and my job. Now my relationship was over, and my job had not made me happy for a year. So I did the only thing that made sense to me: quit my job and be with the people that love me – my parents.

I made a decision. I didn’t wallow although I was upset. I didn’t just throw up my hands and say, “Uh, my life sucks. It is so unfair.” I took my life, and my happiness, into my own hands and made a hard decision. But I am only 23. Where did I learn this resiliency? Well, that answer is simple: my dad.

When I was 14, and he was 55, my dad was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease (PD). I had never heard of PD before, but anything with the word ‘disease’ attached to it is scary. I remember the day my parents told my younger brother and I about the diagnosis. I remember that my dad didn’t look scared, although I am sure he was. He treated his diagnosis like a fact*. He understood that it was unfair that he developed this disease. He understood that his life was forever changed and would always be harder. He understood that it was up to him to make the most of the rest of his life. He joined support groups, stayed active, and underwent multiple groundbreaking brain surgeries. He decided to live his life as a person with Parkinson’s, not as a Parkinson’s Disease patient. His disease is a part of him, but it doesn’t define him.

*I am not saying that this is the right way to cope. There is nothing wrong with wallowing, but never coming out of a depressive state can be tragic.

So that is how I chose to see my situation: as a fact. I was in an unfair and upsetting place, but that wasn’t going to change and the best thing I could do for myself was to take a step forward. That step brought me to LA.

There you have it. A few more details about my life and how I came to the place I am now. So when that curveball comes, are you going to step up to the plate and take your best swing? Let me know.

-TM

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