How relationships are like climbing mountains.
During my 26 years, I’ve been in a few relationships. They’ve lasted anywhere from three days to three years, but one things has always remained true to me: relationships are like climbing mountains.
When setting out on a trek, there are three things I always consider: the point where I want to end up, the path that I want to walk, and the pace I want to go. These are the same three things I’ve realized I look for in a relationship: finding someone who wants to end up at the same place as me, get there in the same way, and is on the same timeline. Let’s explore this idea more.
- The Point – This is the destination where you (and hopefully your partner) want to end up. This is the “I also want two kids” talk, and the “yes, buying a trailer home does sound absolutely dreadful” conversation. This is agreeing that West Coast is the best coast, and weekends are meant to be spent outside. This is also the point where most of my relationships have come to end – when I realized that he and I didn’t have the same end goal — or destination — in mind.
- The Path – This is the route you take to get to your point. There are always multiple paths to choose leading to the same destination. Move to a new city or stay close to home? Direct vs scenic route? I’ve been in relationships where we wanted the same thing, but had completely different ways of getting there (I wanted to walk the hardest, most rewarding path and he wanted to be helicoptered in to the peak). There is so much to see on the journey to your point, so find someone who also thinks your path is the best path (the “yes, seeing that waterfall has been on my bucket list too!” talk).
- The Pace – This is the speed at which you walk the path. It is no fun chasing after someone or constantly waiting around for someone to catch up. It is all of the moments you experience with someone that create a life together, and it is a lot harder to share those moments if you aren’t walking at the same pace, step by step.
The same point, on the same path, at the same pace. The Triple P.
I’ve found my Triple P.
His name is Nick and he is wonderful.
What do you think about my Triple P metaphor? Let us know below.